Are you a people pleaser? I know I can be at times and I think that to an extent it is part and parcel of the human, social experience. I have spent many years of frequently putting my own needs aside for the sake of others, to be accepted in the workplace, to keep the peace at home, to make others feel good – even when it doesn’t make me feel that good in the process. No doubt, if you are reading / listening to this, you probably have too!
That’s not I say I am a doormat – in fact I am probably more of a rebel these days for sure…but as a society, there is a lot of pressure to keep others happy, often at the expense of what we truly want or believe in ourselves.
Right now we are going through the great awakening – a time when people’s beliefs and opinions are becoming more and more amplified and the pressure to bow down and agree with others from the old 3D reality paradigm is increasing.
The split between the 3D, 4D and 5D+ world is becoming more and more evident as time goes by. Personally, I think that even by the end of this year, we will see more and more people wake up but until then, how can we handle the pressure we get from our 3D reality friends and family so that we can stop being a people pleaser and can instead step more into our own truth?
We are all at different stages of evolving – 4D is that space where you realise your own inner power but where chaos and polarity are amplified. This can make us all feel overwhelmed and exhausted and I think now – with everything that is going on, we are all feeling the need to push back and stand in our own power.
I certainly believe that there are times when keeping the peace is needed and indeed useful – for instance, when we are with people and we want to support them or help them to feel good about themselves. I guess there is also an element of pleasing others that drives us to serve humanity so it has it’s positive aspects and a place in our lives.
On the flip side however, it can be a negative thing. As I said earlier, trying to constantly please everyone else can feel overwhelming and exhausting, As the crazy cancel culture pushes down on us, it can result in us agreeing with people just to get them off your back – especially if they are people we are close to.
So whilst it’s human nature to want to ‘be liked’ (unless you are a rebel like me and quite enjoy being stubborn!) how much of this is really healthy for us?
Now more than ever it is not healthy to be a ‘yes’ person. The great awakening is all about us remembering who we are and re-learning how to be sovereign, free human beings. By saying ‘yes’ to others all the time, we are basically saying it’s ok to put our own needs aside and always bow down to the opinions of others.
By bowing down constantly to the opinions of others, we are not doing them or us any favours. It teaches them that relationships only work if they are getting constant validation. It teaches us that our thoughts, emotions and opinions don’t matter as much as other people’s.
It’s time to make a shift from ‘pleasing others’ to ‘respecting our differences’…
… because as much as I just want to shake people sometimes to wake them up or get them to see what I see and understand what is happening behind the scenes, it just isn’t my place. I need to respect our differences whilst politely requesting that they do the same.
So don’t beat yourself up for being a people pleaser – we have been programmed this way for hundreds of years. After all, it’s things like this that keep us firmly in our place so that we don’t rise up too much.
Ultimately, people pleasing is all about needing the approval of others and this only slows down our own journey towards 5D and beyond.
5D is not a physical place, it’s the vibrational dimension of love and light. The chaos we are experiencing is simply the dismantling of the old way of being in this world. Pleasing others with no respect for our own wellbeing or sovereignty does not belong in the new world. It is time to let it go.
Once you accept that we are all different and let that be ok, people pleasing can start to be a thing of the past and mutual respect can then become our new normal – and that feels a million times better than the “new normal’ shoved in our faces by the fear mongering media!
So next time you feel pressure to agree just to please someone else – mentally send them love and light and set your own gentle boundaries. Politely state that you respect their opinion and that it is ok to be different… The world would be a boring place without that contrast…
…but don’t expect them to agree with you either, we all have our own journey to take at our own pace.
And we need to let be ok!